


Ah I’m knackered, I’ve been doing all of this labeling

by thatchedrooftavern



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Chaos, Fluff, Gen, Hijinks & Shenanigans, I have the same amount of understanding of continuity as Jonny Sims, Is this plot?, I’ll fix these tags later, Label maker shenanigans, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Pre-Series, Season one archives gang shenanigans, Whatever the opposite of a grim soufflé is, You are not immune to Timsasha banter, a fluffy fruit tart?, takes place around the beginning of the series, that one bloopers clip where Michael says labeling instead of laboring
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-13
Packaged: 2021-03-20 20:06:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 927
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30010233
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thatchedrooftavern/pseuds/thatchedrooftavern
Summary: The Archives are a mess but Sasha has obtained a label maker to help make it less of a mess.Chaos ensues.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood & Sasha James, Martin Blackwood & Sasha James & Tim Stoker, Sasha James & Tim Stoker, Season 1 Archives Gang!, implied Timsasha - Relationship
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	Ah I’m knackered, I’ve been doing all of this labeling

**Author's Note:**

> Sasha: *obtains a label maker*  
> Me, clutching that one bloopers clip from 101 in my grubby little hands: is this plot?
> 
> In preparation for what will inevitably be a tragic ending to our lovely podcast, I thought I would supply my dear readers with some fluffy season one archives gang shenanigans! 
> 
> Also, I do own a label maker now. I did not own it when I started writing this fic. That’s doesn’t have plot significance but it’s important to me that you know that.

“Martin!” Sasha shouted from the breakroom’s kitchenette. “MARTIN! WHERE’S THE TEA?!”

Not the tea-bearing knight she was looking for, Tim strode into the breakroom from the assistant’s office. Spotting her predicament, he opted not to help and instead to swing a chair around and sit in it backwards. “Looking to spill the tea, Sash?” 

“Not the time, Tim. I have a meeting in 20 minutes and if I don’t get some tea first I am going to _lose it_ at HR Jenna.” Sasha continued to rifle through cabinets, shuffling aside cereals and loose trash bags, while Tim watched with amusement. 

Sasha huffed as one cabinet came up empty. She ripped open another and let out a small yelp as a roll of paper towels, a couple bags of Twiglets, and a lone bagel tumbled out. 

Martin finally poked his head through the doorway. “Hey Sasha, sorry, I was upstairs- woah. You good?”

“Yeah it's just— I thought it was just the archives, is the break room _that_ screwed up too?”

Martin considered the diverse pile of debris Sasha was creating in her wake. 

Tim shifted in his chair and spoke up. “Well shouldn’t we fix it? I’d rather do just about anything than another statement about an immortal spider today. Besides, organizing the cabinets will help us—” he gestured to the three assistants “—in the long term.”

“That’s not a bad plan,” Martin said. “Do you think Jon would approve?”

“He uses the break room too, doesn’t he?”

“Um, I think that’s up for debate—man’s a total workaholic— AH HA!” Sasha pulled her curly haired head from the depths of the cabinets and brandished a single box of earl grey tea to the sky. 

Martin smiled. “Oh nice, Sasha. I can make that for you, if you need me to. I think you said you had a meeting?”

“Oh that would be wonderful, Martin, thank you.” With that, Sasha tossed him the tea and ran back into the assistants’ office. Meanwhile, Tim was scheming.

————

“Sasha, you big nerd, I have a gift for you!” 

Sasha spun round in her desk chair to find Tim holding something behind his back, a smug smile lurking on his face. 

“Oh and what might this gift be?” Sasha asked, a cautious smile creeping in to match Tim’s enthusiasm. 

Tim could be nice when he wanted to, but he could just as easily pull together a devastating prank. His mysterious absence at the day’s lunch was an omen. Of what kind, Sasha didn’t know. 

Tim whipped the gift from behind his back with a flourish and gently placed it in Sasha’s lap. “Ta-da! It’s a label maker!”

“Timothy Jimothy Stoker, you shouldn’t have!” Sasha beamed and looked the label maker over, attempting to divine how the contraption worked. 

Tim smiled along with her, proud that his gift had gone over well. “Oh, I almost forgot.” 

Tim grabbed something from the nearest desk and stuck it on Sasha’s forehead. She immediately pulled it off to read and glared reproachfully at Tim. 

“It says ‘nerd.’”

“I am nothing if not accurate.”

Sasha began typing furiously on the label maker and the handheld device spat out its product. Tim didn’t even wait for her to stick it on before reading the words “hot (derogatory)”.

“Excuse you, Sasha James, this is my badge of _honor_ ,” Tim said, sticking it on the pocket of the Hawaiian shirt Jon either reluctantly let him wear or just never noticed. 

————

Evidently feeling the pressure of his new promotion, Jon only exited his office once or twice a day. It was on one of these rare occasions that afternoon, that Sasha and Tim caught him at his door. 

“Hey, boss.”

Jon, engrossed in a file as he absently left his office, jumped at Tim’s voice. 

“Ah!” he exclaimed, quickly brushing himself down and adjusting his glasses to regain a professional demeanor. “Oh, hello Tim. Did you- uh. Did you have something you needed to tell me?”

“Yes!” interjected Sasha, practically pushing Tim aside. “We were wondering if it would be acceptable to alter our—that is, the assistants’—duties for tomorrow.”

Jon reached up and fidgeted with his glasses again. How did he fit so much anxiety in such a small form? He made a feeble attempt at a commanding presence but it fell short as Tim and Sasha loomed before him. “Oh, um, I really don’t think that would be appropriate. We just— we have all these statements and files. Oh and I just found this statement about that one house in Ox—”

Tim, looking as though he wanted to slap Jon, interrupted him. “Jon, it’s to clean up the break room. The place is a mess—Martin can barely find the tea. It’s atrocious and we would like to fix it.”

“Oh— that’s not… oh.”

Martin and Sasha often called Jon “a little rough around the edges” but all three assistants knew he just tended to be a prick. However, the spiky exterior he maintained dropped momentarily as Sasha spoke. Jon seemed almost touched by the idea. Had no one ever done things for him before? That was depressing. 

Tim seemed not to know what to do with Jon when he was actually having emotions, so Sasha stepped in. 

“Jon, are you okay with that?”

He snapped back to the conversation, but seemed to be more casual than usual. Possibly even friendly. “Yes that would be very helpful. Thank you.” He adjusted his glasses once more and began to leave. “If you’ll excuse me, I have a meeting.”

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter 2 will be up either when the finale is released or on April Fools depending on how productive I can be. 
> 
> Thank you for reading my silly little fic! Comments and kudos are much appreciated and will earn you my eternal love and affection. 
> 
> As always, love and affection also go out to beta Rose @AceOfRoses


End file.
